I have lots of friends who send me emails with jokes, stories or other things to make me laugh (God bless 'em.. keep them coming, folks!) Sometimes they are just too good to not pass on, so today, I'm doing just that....here's your daily chuckle, thanks to my friends Jack and Sheila...
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods....
On the bottom of McCain's Tiramisu dessert: Do not turn upside down. (Well, duhhh.. a bit late, don'cha think?)
On Planter's Peanuts: Warning - Contains nuts. (talk about a news flash!)
On Shopper's Drug children's cough medicine: Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medicine. (We could do a lot to reduce the number of construction accidents if we could just get those five year olds with head colds off those bulldozers...)
On President's Choice Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (And you thought..??)
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (But that's the only time I have to work on my hair...)
On a bag of Fritos: You could be a Winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (Would this be the Shoplifter Special??)
On a package of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (And that would be.....?)
On Swanson frozen dinners: Serving Suggestion: Defrost. (But it's just a suggestion, folks!)
On packaging for a Black and Decker iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save me a lot of time?)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness. (And I'm taking this because...?)
On most packages of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to what?)
On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Ummmm, can someone help me out here?)
On a Westjet package of nuts: Open packet, eat nuts. (Step 3 - Say what?)
On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (I don't blame the company, I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Canadian Tire chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals. (OMG, was there a lot of this happening somewhere??)
That's it folks. Your chuckle for the day. They walk among us..........
Peace and laughter....
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~ Charlie Chaplin